performance evaluation

have you ever been given a performance assessment?
i am up to one via long distance.

my boss just went to canada where he really is based, but he mentioned couple of times that i am near my evaluation time. although he mentioned the perks that are attendant of a good management review, i still have apprehensions for i believe that given my 3-month stay in the company, i still could have done lots better...and i mean it.

i really don't know if it was the lack of time. for i feel, that given the privilege and the love, the trust, the confidence this company has given me...i could go into a 24/7 overdrive but still feel unaccomplished. i knew that there were times i would have given up given the toll of the job and the expectations...there were times i would just fall on our sofa, sitting down, snoring for the life of me because of exhaustion...there were times i would love to jump by the balcony as it happens that my subordinate is one heck of a loser on the job.

but truthfully said, it all comes to pass.
the one upstairs compensates for what has been utterly unpaid for on earth.

i know that it would be highly impossible [tho' not highly improbable] for things to go undeserved and unrecognized in reality, but your time will definitely come. you just hang on there.

for the love of my current position, i have taken risks. i know that there are still a lot of things to be done, to be proven, to be repeated, to be wary of...but that is life.

and i realized that work is just a fraction of life. it must not be the other way around. in the 3 months that i've stayed on envelope pushing, i have realized that one's life must never be taken over by any thing. it was very counterproductive on me. i was getting sicker, getting slovenly by the minute, and i hated it. because truth be told, i love what i am doing.

i love my work.
*hate to admit it.

to answer what the premise was of this post, i don't know really what the assessment will specifically mention. on my end, i will still work my ass off, try to learn as much, much more and try to be the best manager i could ever be, be a team player and make the difference both in impact and velocity.